Child Custody is determined in either a Divorce or Paternity case and can be modified if there is a change in the circumstances of the Parties. Some of the old school presumptions of the roles of moms and dads are changing. Some of this will depend on how active a parent wants to be in a child's life.
There are two types of Custody- SOLE CUSTODY and JOINT CUSTODY. In Sole Custody, only one Parent gets to make the LEGAL decisions for the child such as schools, doctors, medical treatment, etc. Sole Custody is granted if a Parent is unfit or unavailable to make decisions. Sometimes you have a Parent who has some mental disorders, substance abuse problems, or for some other reason might be capable or available to make decisions for the minor child.
Just because a parent fits within one of those categories does not mean they cannot receive Joint Custody, but the Court could consider these factors in what is the best interest of the child. The rule of thumb is that there needs to be something wrong with a Parent that keeps them from being able to make good decisions for the child; however, sometimes a Parent is not interested in being a Parent. If a Parent is ok with Sole Custody, but may want to have some time with the child, the Court will award this type of custodial arrangement.
JOINT CUSTODY allows both Parents to have an equal say in the decision of the minor child. Most Parents will have Joint Custody over their children and need to work together for what is best for their child(ren). The truth is, most of the time people will do what the doctor recommends... so no problem with medical decisions. There will be determination on which address is used for the mailing address for the child, but that does not mean that a parent can move where they want to live. They may have to get the other Parent's approval if they want to move far enough away which would make the current schedule not workable. Really, joint custody is about each Parent being active in the child's life.
Another factor that has increased in frequency is the inability of one Parent to get along with the other. This can be referred to as HIGH CONFLICT PARENTING. In this instance, one of the Parent's simply has difficulty working with the other parent. They will not have any insight into what they might be doing wrong and blame the other Parent 100%. Parallel Parenting sometimes can help-- where each Parents gets to decide what is right for the kids when they are in their care and custody. Other times it helps to have a mixture of Joint and Sole Custody where one Parent has the ability to make all the decisions in a particular area. Dealing with this type of issue requires an attorney experienced in High Conflict as often the approaches are very different than in a normal case. We also highly recommend that the children be in counseling and each Parent does a bit more homework on how to use specific tools to minimize the arguing and improving the communication between them.
The next part of this equation is which Parent will receive the coveted "address of the child for educational and mailing purposes." What this means is which address will be used to register the child for school. While the law does say that the Parent where the child has been living for the last 6 months will receive the presumption until there is another order of the Court, many times the child has been living with both Parents before their separation. You should discuss whether you should file the family law case first and how we can determine what will happen until there is an order of the Court.
While some Courts are slow to adopt equal parenting time, this is certainly the trend in family law. Younger parents seem to be very open to having a 50/50 schedule as much as their work schedules allow. This can certainly impact child support or if any support is even paid. Therefore, before agreements are made, Parents need to remember it is important for the child to have a good living environment in both homes.
Your attorney can help you make the choice of which type of custody is right for you.